I’m a personal stylist. This is literally my job. And right now, getting dressed is one of the hardest things I do.

I’m in perimenopause. And if you are too, or you suspect you might be, I want to talk about what nobody in the fashion world seems to want to say out loud.

All of a sudden, your wardrobe stopped working….

The wardrobe full of strangers

I opened my wardrobe recently and felt nothing. Not excitement, not clarity, just a low hum of “none of this is quite right anymore.”

The things I used to reach for without thinking suddenly felt wrong. Too young, too try-hard, too something I can’t quite name. And I stood there, a professional stylist with a carefully curated wardrobe, thinking, “I have no idea who I’m dressing anymore”

If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Not even close.

The things nobody talks about

Here’s what perimenopause has actually done to my style, in the most honest terms I can manage.

My tummy. For the first time in my life, I’m thinking about my tummy when I get dressed. Not in a hateful way, but in a “that doesn’t sit quite the way it used to” way. Pieces I’ve loved for years now feel uncomfortable in a way I can’t ignore.

My hair. I rely on my hair enormously as part of my overall look. It’s always been a big part of how I put myself together. And right now, it’s thinner, the greys are coming through fast, and some days it just doesn’t do what it used to. That sounds small. It doesn’t feel small.

My confidence. This one surprised me the most. I’ve spent years not particularly caring what people think of how I dress, that freedom was part of my style.

And now? Some days I feel like everyone is watching and judging, and for the first time, I actually care. That shift has been quietly enormous.

Here’s what I’ve come to understand, both for myself and for the clients I work with who are navigating the same thing.

We’re not just adjusting to a new body. We’re grieving an old one. The old rules, the old confidence, the old certainty about what worked. And you can’t just “style” your way out of grief. You have to move through it first.

So if you’re standing in front of your wardrobe feeling lost right now, please hear this: you’re not alone, it’s not a lack of style or effort or taste. It’s a very normal response to a very significant change that most of us were given absolutely no roadmap for.

What I’m actually doing about it

I’m not going to pretend I have this completely figured out, because I don’t. But here’s what’s helping.

I’m letting go of pieces that make me feel bad, even if I loved them once. Keeping clothes that belong to an older version of you is not sentimental, it’s just a daily reminder of something you’ve lost.

I’m dressing for how I feel right now, not for how I used to feel or how I hope to feel in six months. That means softer waistbands, fabrics that move with me, and cuts that skim rather than cling. Comfort doesn’t mean giving up on style. It means respecting where your body is today.

I’m rebuilding around colour and joy rather than rules. When the old certainties fall away, sometimes the best thing you can do is reach for something that simply makes you happy to wear.

And I’m being patient with myself. That last one is the hardest.

You don’t have to figure this out alone

If any of this has landed for you, I’d love to talk. Not to tell you what to wear, but to help you find your way back to a wardrobe that feels like you again — the you that exists right now, not the one from five years ago.

Book a free 30-minute style consult here.

Or if you’re not local, come and join The Style Circle, a community of women navigating exactly this, together. First month is on me, find out more here.

In love and style (and solidarity),

 

 

 

 

Are you ready to step into your style with confidence?….here are 3 ways I can help you get started :

1. book a FREE 30-minute style consultation to chat about how I can help you elevate your everyday style – BOOK HERE

2. Join The Style Circle – my monthly styling membership and get an all-access pass to me – JOIN HERE

3. Ready to work with me? This is your official invitation to work with me this year. To step into your style with confidence CLICK HERE